


Tattered and Torn

by sonicshambles



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: F/F, Future Fic, past Nancy/Barb
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-31
Updated: 2016-10-31
Packaged: 2018-08-24 06:40:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,520
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8361373
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sonicshambles/pseuds/sonicshambles
Summary: Nancy chases demons and tries to escape the ghosts of her past.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Emerla](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emerla/gifts).



The reputation Nancy earned in her ten years in the field was impressive. No one took her seriously at first so she took the most dangerous cases she could find and she worked alone. It didn’t happen quickly but after more than a few successes at clearing out areas of towns that were avoided for centuries Nancy became the one you called when everyone else gave up. 

Everyone thought her borderline reckless drive was to overcompensate for her youthful demeanor and slight build. Truth be told that wasn’t completely inaccurate but the deeper inspiration was the ghosts that haunted her that she couldn’t banish. It was because even a decade later she still dreamed of Barb, still heard Joyce’s screams after they lost Will again and for what was the final time, and so many other horrors. There were too many people in Hawkins no one could save in the end and she made it her life’s work to not let that happen to others. 

It was a balance to let the memories drive her but not overwhelm her and one she couldn’t always maintain. The worst times were when she lost or couldn’t stop a situation before there were casualties. Most recently something broke inside of her when she was too late to save a young girl from a creature she destroyed the next night. She kept her emotions in check as she explained the situation to the family but once alone in yet another dingy hotel room she fell apart. 

Curled up in the center of the bed with the threadbare sheets and comforter pulled completely over her she tried to block out the world as she then knew it. In times like that it was near impossible to remember when she’d felt safe or when the idea of normal seemed boring and a fate worse than death to her. As her chest rose and fell from the deep breaths she took Nancy was able to retreat far enough into her memory to remember another time she’d been cocooned this far under the covers. It was at Barb’s house the year before everything went wrong and they were in the quiet, tranquil part of their Friday night sleepovers that happened an hour or so before they gave into the temptation to fall asleep. Their conversations floated from subject to subject and often drifted off into long periods of peaceful silence. Those silences were her first realization that you could could say nothing to another person and have everything that built up in that quiet say everything. It was a bitterly cold winter night but Barb’s mother refused to turn the heat up so they were burrowed under several blankets and a quilt for warmth. The lights were still on and they could just barely see each other through the dark of their blanket mountain. Nancy felt so cozy and blissful she couldn’t do much more than smile and reach a hand out to clasp Barb’s, just to feel their connection. It was a warm gesture that became something more heated when Barb’s hand found her’s and she stroked the inside of Nancy’s palm with her thumb in a way that made Nancy press her legs closer together. 

It wasn’t something Nancy had thought about. There’d been a dream or two that she’d woken up from hazy on the details but curious about what she could remember. She knew this was possible, knew that women could feel like this towards other women, but that she could was a realization so overwhelming she kept pushing aside. 

Nancy’s memory was fuzzy on who made the next move but in moments their mouths were pressed together, at first with great hesitation but soon with more determination and need. Nancy had kissed a few boys before then but never another girl and never anyone like this. Their arms grew tight around the other and their bodies slowly rocked together in a rhythm they just barely understood would feel good. There was no saying how much further it would have gone if the sound of the furnace kicking on hadn’t signaled Barb’s mother surrendering to the chilly temperatures. They broke apart in a daze and sometime later fell asleep, several layers of blankets shed and close together on the bed but not touching. 

Nothing like that ever happened again and Nancy told herself it was for the best and that it was what she wanted. But as she dreamed of Barb over the years many of those dreams involved that night going much further and she would always wake up from them with a deep aching need.

She tried to shake the memory off and return to fully present in her hotel room but the covers, the walls, and the entire universe seemed to be pressing down on her. Nancy shook the blankets off and tried to do the same with her mood but her skin was crawling. She walked to her luggage and dug around in a bag until her hand closed around the neck of a bottle. The whiskey burned down her throat but didn’t do a thing to calm her down. She brushed her fingers through her hair, ran her hands down the front of her shirt, and with a bitter laugh as she remembered the hours once spent towards getting ready to go out she left her hotel room in search of something to make living inside her skin tolerable. 

Two drinks in at one of the local bars she caught the eye of a woman across the room. With her short red hair and the look that said she was checking Nancy out for all the same reasons Nancy was checking her out it seemed like the universe decided for once to drop in front of her a happy distraction instead of complete destruction. They ended up at the woman’s apartment and it wasn’t long before Nancy found herself naked and on top of her in the woman’s bed. Their mouths and hands had already spent some time exploring and working them into a state when Nancy started to slide her fingers inside her partner. She worked slowly at first, let two slim fingers glide in and out and explore her wetness. But hunger and desperation crawled up inside her and it wasn’t long before Nancy’s movements were harder and faster and a third finger joined the action. She moved her hips in rhythm with her hand and clutched her free hand around the woman’s hips. Her partner gasped and moaned and encouraged her to go harder, a command Nancy happily obeyed. Even after the woman shuddered beneath her Nancy spent several seconds pumping her fingers in and out before easing up on the rhythm. They were a tangle of sweaty limbs for a few minutes but Nancy soon found herself on her back. She moaned and bucked her hips forward as fingers and a tongue touched her in all the right places but it was the glance down at the glint of moonlight against her hand tangled in red hair that completely undid her. 

Afterwards they talked for awhile and listened to the new Nirvana album that everyone seemed crazy about except for her. They eventually drifted off into an easy sleep but Nancy woke up a couple hours later. It wasn’t yet 4am but she dressed silently and tiptoed out of the apartment. She was close enough to her hotel to walk back. Her plan was to check her answering service messages and be prepared to leave town first thing in the morning. Hopefully there would be a new lead for her and a new demon to destroy. Half a block from the apartment building she passed a payphone and after digging around in her bag for the right amount of change decided to check her messages there. Maybe there wouldn’t be any and she could sneak back up, spend a full night with a warm body next to her, spend a morning fucking or eating breakfast in bed, or both. 

“You have one new message. To listen to your message press one now.”

She pressed one with a sigh. 

“Hello...hi...I don’t...I’m not sure how to start. You know this has been, there have been problems for awhile. Weird lights in the woods and cars breaking down on Old Mill Road for no reason. But..people are starting to disappear and...and…” The voice on the phone was that of a female, probably a teenager, and she sounded much younger than that when she started to cry. “My sister went missing two days ago. Her and her boyfriend. My parents think they ran away...but I don’t and I...I found your number. Please help. My number is…”

Nancy scrambled to dig out a pen and paper and write the number down. The act of doing it banished all thoughts of going back upstairs and cozy mornings. She convinced herself this was better and what she wanted. She would win this time and make sure someone else got to exist not surrounded by ghosts.


End file.
